Feature Photo by Kaiwan Shaban

I see, I feel, and I write — Wednesday, June 15, 2022

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Leaving on the headlights signals for others to fuck off. They’ll see me standing here and retract out of fear. Can you tell I’m crazy? Was it the ‘hands in pockets’ that gave me away?

I used to walk here with my puppy. The moonlight would reflect off the creek instead of these headlights shining on my pants’ zippers. I wear a different pair of pants now. But don’t tell them that.

Although I enjoyed those days, I don’t want them back.

What I want, I can’t have. Actually, I can. I just don’t want to do the work. I’d rather sit in front of my car and stare at it like I just committed a murder. Actually, that’s what I’m doing.

I stabbed someone.

I’m getting what I want.

I burned the body.

I lied.

-Budd

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